The Accidental Banana Daiquiri Ice Pop

Do you ever have one of those weeks where you find 18th century France on a 51st century spaceship, get invited to a party in Versailles by the king's mistress, and accidentally invent the banana daiquiri a few centuries early?

Well, then, you know what that must mean. It's a Doctor Who Saturday.

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YAY!!!!!!

In the second season (of the reboot, of course), there is a quite wonderfully bittersweet episode called The Girl in the Fireplace, where the Doctor finds a broken down spaceship filled with space-age, clockwork robots that, for some nefarious purpose, have opened windows into 18th century France.

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One of these windows is a fireplace, and the Doctor meets a young French girl named Reinette Poisson, known to history as Madame de Pompadour.

And let me tell you, Reinette might be all fancy and regal and French, but she is totally the ultimate fangirl.

First of all, she meets the Doctor twice as a child. He's a man that just appears out of her fireplace, but since the 10th Doctor has that "trust me, I'm cute" look to him, and that 50 million megawatt smile-- not to mention that he saves her from a seriously creepy robot under her bed-- she's totally cool with it. And when he comes back, what does she do? That's right boys and girls, she kisses him

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But really, can you blame her?

Ten was the romantic Doctor, the one we were meant to fall in love with. So really, Reinette was just doing what we all wanted to. And she knew, just as we do, that the Doctor might be mad and wonderful, but he's also dangerous. But she also knew, just as we do, that the Doctor is worth the monsters. After all:

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And then she invites the Doctor to dance with her. She says it's to make the King of France jealous, but we all know what you're really up to, Reinette. We're fangirls, too.

The Doctor being the Doctor, brought a banana to the party, and may have, just a little bit, invented the banana daiquiri a few centuries early.

And that's where these ice pops come in. They're not a few centuries early, but they were supposed to be ice cream instead of pops, so I'm totally keeping with the Doctor's theme here. (I thought I could get away without freezing my ice cream maker, but it was too thin. Sad face)

Now you guys know that I don't much care for booze, and I don't like coconut, but these pops just might convert me. The coconut milk brings a subtle, sweet coconut undertone and a great creaminess. Then you've got the stronger flavors of the banana and the lime, which, as far as I'm concerned, you can't go wrong with. I think I'd still prefer it without the rum, but as cocktails go, I'm totally sold.

And maybe if I keep my freezer stocked with these, the Doctor will come and dance with me, too.

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Banana Daiquiri Ice Pops
Yield: 6 pops

Ingredients
2 large bananas, chopped and frozen
1 tsp. lime zest
1 can coconut milk
Juice of 1/2 a lime
2 tbsp. sugar
1 oz. (2 tbsp.) white rum

Directions
In a blender, add the bananas and lime zest. Blend until smooth. In a separate bowl, whisk together the lime juice, coconut milk, and sugar until the sugar is dissolved. Add the milk mixture and the rum to the mixer and pulse on low until well mixed. Pour into ice pop molds or plastic cups with popsicle sticks, being careful to leave at least ½ inch from the tops of the containers. Freeze for a minimum of 6 hours.

Recipe by Kim

Lemon Daiquiri Ice Pops

Now, you guys know: I don't drink. I pretty much was like the opposite of every college kid ever. No coffee, no parties, no drinking. I went to a friend's party over at Rutgers once (which I only went to because I rarely got to see her), and she had cranberry juice just for me and the bestie (neither of us are drinkers) so that we could play slap cup with them.

And I somehow managed to get like adopted by one of her frat guy friends, who was very sweet, but also drunk, and therefore rather excessive. He insisted we be on the same team for slap cup so that he could teach me how to play, and wanted high fives all night and hugs goodbye. (This may have also been one of my wait-that-was-flirting? moments, but I really just think he was being nice. While drunk)

Anyway, my point is, you guys are a terrible influence. I've consumed more booze writing this blog than my entire college career. Raspberry Red Wine Ice Cream, Drunken Apple Pie, Pina Colada Marshmallows, heck, even my Black Forest Icebox Cake has wine in it.

And now this. Lemon Daiquiri Ice Pops. You all should be ashamed of yourselves.

I mean, I have eaten one of these pops every night after dinner this week. Every night. I'm turning into a downright lush. Next thing you know, I'll be weaving down the street, swigging my booze out of a brown paper bag.

Food blogging: a gateway to addiction. I wonder if anyone's mentioned it to Oprah.

Well, at least this one came at good time. These pops are basically lemonade plus rum that's been frozen. Super bright, super lemony, and super refreshing, they're perfect for the oppressive heat and humidity we've been living with lately. And they're so easy to make: just zest, squeeze, mix, pour and freeze.

Now if you'll excuse me, I think it's time for my nightly ice pop. *hic*

Lemon Daiquiri Ice Pops

Ingredients
1 & 1/2 cups cold water
1/2 cup sugar
2 tbsp. rum
3 lemons

Directions
In a mixing bowl or large measuring cup, mix the water, sugar, and rum until the sugar is well dissolved.

Grate the zest of one of the lemons. Juice all three. Discard the seeds, but keep the pulp. Mix the zest, juice, and pulp with the remaining ingredients. Pour into ice pop molds or plastic cups with popsicle sticks, being careful to leave at least ½ inch from the tops of the containers. Freeze for a minimum of 6 hours.

Recipe adapted from Ben & Jerry's Homemade Ice Cream & Dessert Book

Piña Colada Marshmallows

Do you ever just get an idea just stuck in your head that won't leave? And it just kind of sits there, rattling around inside your skull like it's a tangible thing until you do something about it?

That was me and these marshmallows.

I don't like piña coladas. I don't like coconut. I don't like rum. But the idea for these marshmallows would not leave me alone, no matter how many times I asked. I tried being polite. I tried being firm. I tried being mean. But it just kept poking at me. Lurking there just inside of my consciousness. Popping up whenever I went to bake something.

Honestly, I have less trouble with my characters, and it's usually a given that they'll find some way to rebel against me.

And the worst part was that I couldn't do anything about it, because the humidity was a killer. I wasn't going to try making marshmallows while the weather was so gross and wet and sticky. That, my friends, would have been a recipe for disaster.

But then, after 7 straight days of rain (I think I'm turning into a mushroom; it's still raining (as of when I wrote this on Tuesday)), the humidity finally cleared up, and I was able to get these marshmallows out of my head.

Not surprisingly, these are not my favorite. But I had so much fun styling them and rolling them in coconut and putting them in my pretty blue mason jars that I won from Kelli's Retro Kitchen Arts and using the little cocktail umbrellas I found in the dollar store, that I consider it an even trade. I also toasted the coconut, because I thought it would be prettier that way. :D

I also can't really speak to how much they taste like piña coladas since I don't drink piña coladas. They're sweet and cocnutty with a hint of pineappleishness. I also used a coconut bakery emulsion, which has a stronger and more complex flavor, but regular coconut extract would be fine. You don't really taste the rum, and I'm not sure if that's because I used clear Jamaican rum (it's the only kind I had, and I certainly wasn't going out to buy more), if it evaporated off, or a combination of the two. A splash of rum extract would fix you there, or skip it all together, using water in place of the rum, for a virgin version. If you want to be all inauthentic 'n stuff. :P

Piña Colada Marshmallows
Yield: Approx. 77 marshmallows

Ingredients
Approx. 4-6 oz. shredded coconut (sweetened or unsweetened)
2/3 cup rum, chilled*
3 packets unflavored gelatin2 cups granulated sugar
1 cup pineapple syrup**
1/2 cup water
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. coconut extract or bakery emulsion
A few drops yellow food coloring (optional)
Non-stick cooking spray
Powdered sugar

Directions
If desired, toast the coconut: preheat the oven to 325°F. Spread the coconut in an even layer on a rimmed baking sheet and bake 5-10 minutes until lightly browned, stirring once midway through. Allow to cool completely.

In the bowl of a stand mixer with the whisk attachment, add the chilled rum and gelatin and let soften. Spray a 7x11” baking dish with cooking spray, sprinkle liberally with powdered sugar, and spread an even layer of shredded coconut on top. Set aside.

In a LARGE saucepan, add the sugar, syrup, water, and salt. Heat on low, stirring constantly until the sugar is completely dissolved. Heat mixture to boiling. Let boil, without stirring, until the mixture reaches 240°F (the soft ball stage) on a candy thermometer, about 30 minutes. Remove from heat.

Start the mixer on low speed, and CAREFULLY add the syrup to the softened gelatin (please utilize a splatter shield, if available). Increase the speed to high, and whip until the mixture is white, fluffy, and tripled in size, about 10 minutes. Add the extract and food coloring, if using. Using a rubber spatula sprayed with cooking spray, spread the mixture evenly into the prepared baking dish. Sprinkle liberally with shredded coconut and press down lightly. Let sit uncovered 8 hours or overnight.

Dust a cutting board with powdered sugar. Using a sharp knife or pizza cutter sprayed with cooking spray, cut the marshmallows into 1 inch squares. Toss in remaining coconut and serve.

NOTE: The sugar syrup is extremely hot and can be dangerous if not handled correctly. Use potholders and splatter shields when necessary, and always avoid distractions when making any kind of candy.

*Replace with cold water for a virgin version, adding rum extract if desired.

**I used the syrup from a can of diced pineapple in heavy syrup (combined with some light corn syrup because there wasn't quite enough for a full cup), but any sort of pineapple-flavored syrup (such as sno cone syrup) should work as well.


Recipe by Kim

Drunken Apple Pie

Me and pie, we have some issues. Well, not so much pie, as pie crust. I can't make it. I've got this mental block. I mean I make it, but then it won't roll out because it's hard, or I roll it out and it sticks to everything, or I don't roll it out thin enough, or I can't get it to roll out in a circle, and it's too long one way and too short the other, or I'm incompetent and can't manage to get it in the tin right.

And then I'll be watching a show on the cooking channel about pie and they'll be all, oh, it's so easy to make your own crust. And then when you roll it out, you just wrap it on the rolling pin and just drape it over the tin. And I'm like, that does sound easy, Kelsey. Thanks! And then I try it and it's an epic fail and I'm reduced to tears, sobbing over the mess that I was sure this time was going to be a beautifully flaky pie crust.

But you guys see that excessively ugly pie up there? Do you see it? Do you know why it's so ugly? Because I made pie crust! Successfully. Cut in cold butter, sprinkled ice cold water, rolled out with a rolling pin, crimped the edges and everything.

And of course, it had vodka in it.

Yes, you read that right. See, I was looking through the Dash magazine that comes in the Sunday paper, and they were giving Thanksgiving tips, and the last one was all, pie crust is so finicky. So they were all, we swear by this recipe and vodka is the magic ingredient! And it worked.

So I had my vodka pie crust, what should I put in it? My brother says, "How about drunken apples?"

Genius runs in the family.

And then my father wanted raisins in it, but I could only find one little box of raisins, so I decided to make mini pies. I put raisins in one, toffee bits in the other, and kept the third plain apple. This is the raisin one. Can you see the R that I carved in the crust?

And believe it or not, this is the best looking of the three pies. Well, in the tin, the plain apple one looked better, but when I took it out, well...

Dammit man, keep it together!

My drunken apples imbibed a little too heavily there. Or it could have been baked longer. Heh.

...What's that? You want to see the one with the toffee bits? No, you don't. No, you really, really don't. It looks like something out of a cheesy horror movie about baked goods.

...Okay, but don't say I didn't warn you.

AIEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Quick, get out of here! The vodka crust will only hold it back for so long. Save yourselves!

Got the patchwork top crust holding back something lurking in the depths of the apple pie filling. It looks like it's going to explode any minute now.

Yeah, this one's looking better and better, huh?

 Of course, who really cares what the outside looks like? Like any dessert, it's what's on the inside that counts.

Mmm, boozey apples....

Spiced Piecrust {Printable Version}

Yield: 2 piecrusts

Ingredients
2 cups flour
2 tbsp. sugar
2 tsp. apple pie spice
1 tsp. salt
½ cup unsalted butter, chilled and cut into small chunks
4 tbsp. solid white vegetable shortening (Crisco), chilled and cut into small chunks
2 tbsp. vodka
Approx. ¼ cup ice cold water

Directions
In a large mixing bowl, whisk together the flour, sugar, spices, and salt. Using a pastry cutter, cut in the butter and shortening until the mixture looks like wet sand, and there are no pieces bigger than small peas. With a fork, mix in the vodka and just enough of the water that the dough comes together and is slightly tacky. Divide the dough in half, flatten each half into disks, wrap separately in plastic wrap, and refrigerate for a minimum of 45 minutes, or up to two days. Roll out as desired on a well-floured surface.

Tip: Whenever you have to handle the dough, make sure to only use the tips of your fingers. This is the coolest part of your hand, and will help keep the butter from melting.

Recipe adapted from Dash Magazine

Drunken Apple Pie {Printable Version}

Yield: 3 mini deep dish pies (or 1 regular 9 inch pie)

Ingredients
6-7 apples peeled and chopped into ½ inch pieces (approximately 6 cups)
Juice of 1 orange
¼ cup flour
2 tbsp. rum
2 tbsp. brown sugar*
1 tbsp. cornstarch
1 tsp. apple pie spice
¼ tsp. vanilla extract
1 recipe Spiced Piecrust
Raisins, toffee bits, or dried cranberries, if desired, 1-2 oz. per mini pie
Water, for brushing, and cinnamon sugar, or 1 egg beaten with 1 tsp. water

Directions
Preheat the oven to 425°F. Toss the apples with the orange juice immediately after chopping to prevent browning. In a large mixing bowl, mix the apples with the flour, rum, sugar, cornstarch, spices, and vanilla, making sure the apples are well coated. If desired, add mix-ins, such as raisins. You can also divide the filling into 3 equal parts first and add a different mix-in to each.

Roll out the piecrust on a well-floured surface to approx. ¼ inch thickness. Cut 3 circles about 2-3 inches larger than the lip of the mini pie tins for the bottom crusts. For the top crusts, cut 3 circles about ½ an inch larger than the lip of the pie tins. Line the tins with the bottom crusts, and divide the filling equally between them. Place the top crusts over the filling and seal the two crusts together, pinching them with your fingers, or pressing the edges together with a fork dipped in flour.

Brush the tops of each pie with water and sprinkle with cinnamon sugar, or brush each with the egg
wash. Score the tops with a sharp knife, place on a rimmed baking sheet, and bake for 30-35 minutes,
until the filling is bubbling, and the crust is golden brown.

*Depending on how sweet your apples are, this amount may need to be adjusted.

Recipe by Kim